• How Divorce Affects Children - the Good and Bad

How Divorce Affects Children – the Good and Bad

Most children are resilient and can handle divorce better than we expect. On the other hand, there are some children who suffer academically and socially as a result of a divorce. Read on to learn more about how divorce affects children and how A People’s Choice can help you.

How Divorce Affects Children Emotionally

Children of divorced parents often suffer from abandonment issues and the loss of love. Furthermore, it has been found that divorced children are more likely to abuse drugs, commit crimes, have children outside of marriage, and commit suicide. Studies have also shown that teenagers in a single-parent family are three times as likely to need psychological help.

All of these studies show that children from divorced parents are affected in some way when their parents divorce. Divorce often has negative impact on children, however, some children actually rise above and use the experience to later define themselves in a positive way.

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One of the major emotional factors for the children of divorce is that they often blame themselves and often think it is their fault as to why their parents are divorcing. Children may believe they are the underlying issue for their parents’ divorce. Some even go as far as believing that if their behavior changed, they could get their parents back together. Such children need psychological counseling to understand that their conduct is not the underlying reason for their parents’ divorce.

How Divorce Affects Children Academically

Several studies show that children often fall behind in their math and social skills upon their parents’ filing for divorce. The younger a child is when their parents’ divorce, the greater the impact divorce is on them. Children exposed to divorce are twice as likely to repeat a grade. Studies from the early 80’s showed that children who experienced subsequent divorces earned lower grades than their peers and were rated as less pleasant to be around.

New research suggests divorce, not the discord leading up to it, can negatively impact kids’ performance at school. In a study of 3,500 children, those whose parents divorced between the first and third grade scored lower in math and had poorer interpersonal skills than those whose parents stayed married.

How Divorce Affects Children’s Future Relations

According to Scientific American, children experience short-term negative effects from divorce. However, research has also shown that a small amount of adults who were children of divorced couples experience serious problems such as depression and relationship issues.

New research suggests divorce, not the discord leading up to it, can negatively impact kids’ performance at school. In a study of 3,500 children, those whose parents divorced between the first and third grade scored lower in math and had poorer interpersonal skills than those whose parents stayed married.

The current findings suggest that women whose parents divorced are more likely to enter marriage with relatively lower commitment to, and confidence in, the future of those marriages, potentially raising their risk for divorce.

Statistics About How Divorce Affects Children

The U.S Census Bureau has collected extensive data on how divorce affects children. In particular, 50% of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce. Couples with children have a lower divorce rate than couples without children. In the U.S., 43% of children are being raised without their biological father present. Over 75% of children of divorced parents live with their mothers. More than half of American children will witness the breakup of their parent’s marriage and 28% of children will live through poverty as a result of divorce.

Children Can Learn Positive Lessons From Divorce

Although divorce can certainly have a negative impact on children, some children whose parents divorced actually learn life-long lessons through the process.

Children Can Develop Resiliency:  For example, children with divorced parents are often faced with varying lifestyles of their separated parents. Children must learn to adapt and develop coping strategies that children of non-divorced parents often learn later in life. When children are forced to overcome these obstacles and deal with changes, it can make them more resilient in life.

Children Can Become More Self-Sufficient: Split families often result in economic challenges that go hand-in-hand with single parenting. A parent may need to have the older children be home by themselves for a few hours after school or help more with household chores. These situations can result in children becoming more self-sufficient and confident in their own abilities, which is a positive outcome.

Children Can Develop More Empathy Towards Others: A separation of a family can be shocking for children. It can also make children more sympathetic to problems of others around then. They can be empathetic with their peers because they have personally experienced the same sense of loss.

Quality Time With Parents May Increase: When parents are divorced, family time shifts from spending time with both parents to spending time with each parent separately. These separate times offer a different bonding experience because a child is able to spend personal time with each parent. Children can often learn more about their mother or father in this environment. Divorced parents (and particularly dads) also tend to set aside more dedicated time with their children. This is because parents often schedule special activities when they are having to share custody and visitation, than they may have when they were married.

Marriage May Be Viewed Differently: Children coming from a divorced family have personally experienced the resulting distribution and loss when a marriage has failed. This experience, however, may also give them a better perspective about the hard work that goes into making marriage successful. Some children coming from divorced parents have been known to spend more conscientious time focusing on how to make their marriage better than their parents did. On the other hand, some children coming from divorced parents sometimes decide not to get married at all.

Divorce is not easy on parents or children. If you are considering filing for divorce in California, contact A People’s Choice for help. We can draft and file your divorce papers at a very low cost. We can also refer you to counselors to help your family get through this tough time and adjust to your new family dynamic.

Sources

Two Minus One: Divorce Drops Kids’ Math Scores

Effects of Parental Divorce on Marital Commitment and Confidence

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By |2018-01-18T15:46:41+00:00August 16th, 2016|Family Law|0 Comments

About the Author:

Sandra M. McCarthy, founder of A People’s Choice Inc., has worked exclusively in the legal field since 1976. She served as the 2004-2005 President of CALDA (California Association of Legal Document Assistants). She obtained a Paralegal Certificate from the University of California, Santa Barbara. During her career in the legal field, she has worked as a freelance paralegal, law office manager and paralegal studies teacher, and has co-authored numerous legal publications and written hundreds of self-help legal articles. As a registered Legal Document Assistant, Sandy is dedicated to providing affordable, low-cost, self-help document preparation services for California consumers in all 58 counties.

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