Decide What You Both Want and What You Both Do Not Want
First, agree that you want to divorce, and decide what is most important to you. Every couple is different, but these are some things that you might list as a top priority:
- Saving money
- Not airing your family’s dirty laundry in court
- Maintaining stability and continuing for the children, such as not having them change schools
- Staying on good terms with each other’s parents
Keep your most important wishes and fears in mind at all times, to help you stay focused on the goal. This makes it easier to reach an agreement about the terms of your divorce. If you and your spouse agree on the major issues, such as division of assets and debts, who stays in the marital home, and parenting time, then you can have an amicable divorce that is uncontested, and no one needs a lawyer.
An Amicable Divorce May Mean You Agree to Disagree
Agreeing to go your separate ways is a relief for unmarried couples. Commit to not letting the things that bothered you about your spouse during your marriage threaten your amicable divorce. Now that you have decided to divorce, your spouse’s political views, bad breath, and hideous taste in clothes are not your problem. Let it go, and focus on getting out of your marriage peacefully.
Talk About Your Ugliest Feelings, but Not With Your Spouse
When you interact with your spouse, stay focused on your goals, namely your divorce and your co-parenting relationship. Treat your spouse as a colleague, not as the person who broke your heart. Even when you do this, the hurt feelings of your broken marriage do not instantly disappear. You need someone to talk to about them, but your spouse is not that person. Instead, vent to a friend or have a therapist help you deal with your feelings of hurt, anger, and disappointment.
A Legal Document Assistant is the Key to an Amicable Divorce
Keeping things professional instead of adversarial is what makes an amicable divorce amicable; hiring a certified legal document assistant can help you avoid blaming each other for excessive spending or clerical errors. Contact A People’s Choice at 800-747-2780 to prepare the documents in your amicable divorce.
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